I’ve said for awhile that the juggernaut of the homosexualist agenda gets most of its fuel not from homosexuals, but ideologically-addled straight people. Joe K at Ed Feser’s blog says the same thing and unpacks it a little more:
In my experience, the hardest part about being homosexual is not getting turned on by hot guys (though that can be pretty frustrating sometimes). It’s being pressured by the entire world to “be myself,” “live my life,” etc. You hear constant rhetoric about how “oppressed” people are who can’t have sex with whom they please, how people who don’t are just “living a lie.”
You’d think most pressure comes from the gay community, and a certain amount of it kind of does, but it’s actually mostly from the straight community. They gay community always reacts kind of “hurt” (like Leah points out here) when you discuss sexual ethics or say I refuse to live that way, etc. It’s like your not doing what they’re doing is the strongest judgment of them that exists. And in a Certain way it is, but it’s not; I don’t talk with gay people that much, and I pretty much stay out of the debates not on the internet. What I find a little interesting is that there’s this certain level on insecurity and guilt about it. I think, in some ways, homosexuals recognize that it’s Not impossible to not live the life they’re living. I think that’s usually the way their lives are justified to themselves: “I can’t Live, it’s Impossible, without this outlet; I Cannot Be Wrong if the alternative is death.”
The worst, by far, are heterosexuals, who are all about gay rights, though. This may be because they are the majority, but in a certain way I think it’s deeper than that. I think their defending of homosexuals is driven by a couple things. One, it comes from this weird perverted notion that you always have to protect the weak and “not judge” No Matter What. It’s derived, I think, from Christian notions of love, but it has to turned into this terrible monster known as modern liberalism. It’s actually become the case that defending the weak is more important than identifying the truth. This whole idea is rampant, and it’s pretty much suffocating to any real discussion on moral issues. “Don’t judge! What makes your life any better! You’re just filled with hate!” etc. etc. etc. Everyone has to be equal, no matter the stakes, no matter what. If you imply Anything to the contrary, you’re basically Hitler who wants to kill all gay people. And while this push is definitely from the gay community (it’s how they gain their power), it’s most strong (and most despicable) from straight people. It’s despicable because they don’t know what they’re doing. They just bandwagon on someone else’s slave morality to the degradation of everything around them. And worst of all, they’re Zealous about it. They get mad, scary mad about it.
The second reason heterosexuals provide so much pressure against moral living is similar to the reason gay people do. A person who espouses Any sexual ethics (literally at all), is assaulting their own lifestyle. Because, let’s face it, heterosexuals are just as bad, or worse, about sexual purity than homosexuals. I basically know no people who don’t cohabitate. I basically know no people who haven’t sought relationships Just For The Sex. A friend of mine was asking which girl he should date. He explained their strengths and weaknesses to me. I told him to date the one he thinks he could marry. He laughed, looked at me like I was crazy, and then the conversation got awkward. That’s really the only sentence I said to him; I didn’t push anything, I wasn’t being preachy about it; I honestly thought that was the best, most rational advice. But it wasn’t even on his radar. And he’s a pretty decent person too. No, any talk about sexual ethics is an assault on almost All people. And that’s not cool. It’s way too hard to live your life moral with respect to sex. It’s also way too philosophical. With other things you can see external results more quickly and more clearly. Stealing has clear effects, as does lying. But having sex with your girlfriend? What’s wrong with that.
Beyond all this, the problem I personally face the most is not having any real outlet for myself. I don’t mean sexual outlet. I mean, societal outlet. Gay people have communities, but I don’t have any interest in those communities. They’re built around a weird lie. And as I’ve noted, straight people are even worse. So I end up sitting on the internet a lot. And this is what bugs me about the whole thing the most. There’s no real place for people like me. The closest is church stuff, but I don’t really like church stuff. I don’t like church “communities.” I like bowing before the presence of Christ, I don’t really like bowling awkwardly with dorky church people who would probably be just as sinful as the secular people I’m avoiding if they were just a little cooler. (I know there are cool people who attend churches; I’m just speaking generally.) And it’s actually a little hard to break into the super conservative groups (the genuine ones, not the goofy Republicany ones). They tend to, even if they respect my life choices, think it’s just a little weird that I find men sexually attractive. At the very least, it’s not something to talk about. But the inevitable question always comes up if you don’t say anything: “Hey, man, why aren’t you married?”
All that said, I’ve never been happier with my life for what it’s worth, and I really appreciate your praise. And I hope I’ve made it clear that I’m not bitter because I don’t get to have sex. The only thing I’m bitter about, if I am really bitter at all, is the way the world has no place for anyone who doesn’t have an interest in what the world has become. The way you it is definitely correct: the bread the devil offers is just the post-modern western world. There’s that Fiona Apple lyric, “hunger hurts, but starving works,” that might be appropriate here. Heh, I’m not sure she meant it to apply this way.

I don’t find much, if anything at all, to disagree with here. I have straight relatives who fit Reason #1, and they have told me that I’m a bigot for opposing so-called same sex marriage. It’s not the homosexual community that is making the issue difficult to argue – it’s their surrogates on the straight side that have found it easier to, as he said, to defend the weak rather than defend the truth.
Indeed. I recall Lydia who comments here, noting that when she was lobbying in town for perfectly rational legislation against making homosexuality a protected class, straight people told her they agreed, but wouldn’t sign because they didn’t want to appear to be “against the gays”.
It’s absolutely true, the majority of people in the town did feel that way. OTOH, it’s kind of a mutual support society. If there had never been any gay activists, there wouldn’t have been the opportunity for the liberals to jump on the bandwagon. So it goes both ways.
I hafta admit: Aren’t some of his comments a little childish? All that about not wanting to bowl with dorky people. I mean, um. So he’s the king of cool? I’m afraid to me that sounds like a 13yo talking. Grow up. Most people in the world are dorky. God loves the dorky. It’s possible to understand his discomfort with groups of straight people and the question, “Why aren’t you married?” That’s understandable. Homosexuality is a real cross, and there is a lot of inevitable and painful isolation. But he kind of trivializes it by expressing it in terms of wanting to hang around with cool people rather than, oh, I dunno, wanting to find some people he can serve? Wanting to find a place where God can use him?
I guess I shd. add, too: The homosexual and transexual activists in that ordinance fight were very vocal, and very creepy. (Since I don’t care what other people think, I don’t mind the fact that this wd. mean that I get called “homophobic.” Whoop-de.) Sure, they were in enough of a minority that they could never have passed their ordinance but for a) their ardent supporters among the liberal straights and b) all the wimps who “didn’t want to be against the gays.” But the vocal and in-your-face queers were a group to make the blood run cold, especially when one knew the kinds of things that groups like them have done elsewhere. I can’t help thinking that the fellow who wrote that comment just hasn’t experienced what various churches and business owners as well as individuals around the country have experienced in terms of vandalism, threats, frightening “protests,” and the like.
Valid points Lydia. I did get a sense of what you described in your comments, but it is so rare to find a homosexual who recognizes the wrongness of the act and committed to avoiding it, that I am willing to cut him plenty of slack.
Apropos of whether the straight people or the homosexual activists are the problem, I think there’s some wisdom in a comment on my thread on the Lisa Miller case at W4. http://www.whatswrongwiththeworld.net/2012/08/this_is_not_a_game.html#comment-175022
Commentator Untenured pulls no punches:
“As an ex-liberal, I hu[n]g out with a lot these people, because I felt it gave me more “cred” and made me a more “authentic” member of the counter-culture. I personally know, and have have now disengaged with, people who are members of the Lambda Alliance.
Dan Savage is the norm among these types, and I can tell you that he is [reining] it in relative to what I have seen and heard in person. Homosexual activists are, for the most part, a bunch of angry, bitter and unbelievably spiteful nihilists who absolutely despise normal Christians and are willing to deploy any legal and political means at their disposal to raze it to the ground. They have a demonic, hell-bent ruthlessness about them. If they could push a button and send all the Conservative Christians in the world to the gas chamber, they would do it in a heartbeat.
And they know they are winning the culture-war and that it is now just a question of how far they can push the envelope. And they punch above their weight, because they know they need to wheedle their way into the academic, legal and governmental professions.”
I am a gay Catholic living a life of celibacy for the love of Christ, and, having lived this way for many years, I have to concur that my way of life is an offense not so much to gays but to heterosexuals that support the gay agenda. I feel closeted not by my sexual orientation, but by celibacy! And, I have to say that the social alienation that I have experienced from this is deep, so deep and painful that the outlet I took was to write about it. You can visit and read about my experience at simonjamesonline.com SJ
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